Life is Roller Coaster Ride : Nice story --1

I sipped my favorite Nescafe Classic sitting on my couch, watching the latest songs. It’s another beautiful Saturday morning, which means a lot to me, yah I am Preethi, hard core IT employee. It’s already 10.30 AM, but I was least bothered, cause this is the day where there are no onsite calls, status updates, KT sessions, Training sessions etc. etc. My mom urged me to take bath; because this is the day my parents were waiting for. Yah most of the decisions were done, the horoscopes were matched, both the parents are satisfied with various different constraints and criteria’s. The only thing pending is that the girl and the boy i.e. me and Rahul has to see each other personally as we have confirmed our decisions only by seeing the photographs. I sighed. I went to my bed room, where my maid was cleaning and arranging all the old stuffs. One of my chudi stuffed in the old box got my attention. I took it; it smelled with the old cardboard smell, it’s a striped cream top with purpled bottom and dupatta.I couldn’t bear the burden in my heart. I don’t know what was that feeling exactly. It’s none other than my college uniform. I sat on my bedstead holding my college uniform. My mind rolled back 7 years back.

Owing to my family financial constraints, I was forced to take a local college, so that my parents can reduce the hostel fees. My parents were disappointment cause I didn’t score enough to secure a seat in a government college, but they are satisfied that I at least got the Dote 2 quota i.e. Free seat, in a decent college in my home town itself. I dreamt of many things, how will be my class, how should I speak, my staffs, department etc. and I also dreamt of the guy of my life..hmm..how will he be??

18 JUNE 2007 was my first day to college. My parents accompanied me. I saw few of the guys from my school, who I literally hate to see. We had the induction session. Once that was done, a hand patted my back. It’s Thivya. She screamed, you joined here ? I smiled back at her. She is my school mate. Thivya introduced me to two other girls Anu and Priya. Somehow we gelled up very soon. The formalities were done and the college has arranged buses for departure. I waved bye to my friends and moved towards the bus bay. There were some volunteers helping the parents and the new joinees to take the right bus.

My mom exclaimed, hey Vikram what are you doing here? He turned back! I literally fainted the moment I saw him! He was tall, brownish and handsome. He smiled broadly at my mom, and said aunty, I study here. I am in to my second year CSE. My mom screamed Oh great! I am so glad, my daughter Preeti is joining here this year in CSE department only. So no worries of ragging for my daughter since you are here. She said, Preeti this is Vikram , my best friends son. I said Hi weakly! He replied back with a base voice and a beautiful smile HI!!!I couldn’t see his eyes and I diverted immediately. He introduced Shiva to my mom, aunty this is Shiva!! My best friend, We are buddies from our 5th standard, he too is in 2nd year CSE. They exchanged few words and Vikram guided us to our Bus. I sat in the window seat bewildered, without knowing what is happening in my mind. The bus squawked and started, I hesitantly looked back and my eyes met two pairs of eyes ..hmm…both Vikram and Shiva gazed back at me. Hastily I turned back and didn’t breath for few seconds. I washed my face, and headed to sleep. I couldn’t sleep that night. I thought about Vikram all the time, sometimes I laughed, sometimes I felt stupidly irritated. Without knowing that the next four years of my life is going to be a roller coaster ride, that will etch a deep mark in my heart, I headed to sleep.

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I stood waiting for my college bus, with all new stuffs on me, new blue chudi, new bag, new hairstyle, what all to say. I boarded my bus, the girl in the front ushered me to move to the 5th seat...oops again I saw both Vikram and Shiva smiling at me sitting in the seventh seat behind the staffs. The staffs sit as a wall between the girls and the boys. After a few stops Thivya and Anu boarded the bus. We all sat together and giggled talking about our new class. Priya boarded in the last stop, she waved at us and sat in the other end.

We all sat in our new class. It’s a broad class room with three windows on each side of the room. There were 3 columns with 5 rows in each column. The 1st column was occupied by the girls and the rest two columns were the boys. We occupied the last row…ha ha…The last row girls… Our first staff, Mr. Raj gave a bright smile and introduced him. He made everybody to introduce themselves with their objective. Ganesh, the weirdest guy in the class made all nasty jokes and gave a look at the girls for every 10 second interval. God!! I hated him like anything. An office boy interrupted us and told all the students to move to the computer lab to collect their uniforms, books and instruments.

We giggled and moved and we all stood in a queue to collect the things. Suddenly Priya whispered, hey look at the guy in the first row in the nearby class, he looks awesome…Anu sighed awwww…Priya interrupted he is Ok de not awesome. I leaned back to look at the guy, Oh God, I nearly dropped. It was Vikram and Shiva. I was not sure whom they were talking about. Since they were in uniform, I don’t know how to distinguish and confirm. I stood erect, posing that I am least bothered. But really I did know how fast my heart was beating. We collected our stuffs and went back to our seat.

In the interval, one of the senior girls called all four of us in to nearby classroom. There were around many girls and boys. We dint know what to do. She gave a strong stare at us and questioned what u girls formed the gang from the very first day ...hah? So what’s your name? Trembling I replied Preethi!! Everybody gave a loud thud of laugh! I wondered what is so funny about my name! One guy from the back, shouted! Ok Preethi enact the preethi Mixer Grinder AD!!! I was startled! It’s none other than Vikram! I couldn’t believe. The senior girl patted his back and said well-done Vikram! And yelled at me Hey do it! I did Weakly and softly I said “ Preethi Vanngha Naan Guarantee”[I guarantee for buying Preethi mixer and grinder]They all laughed all together, Then Vikram screamed again…hello madam do it with actions!!! What is this? Have we come here to see mono acting? My tears were about to fall! I breathed heavily and from nowhere Shiva came in to the scene and said to me, take your friends and go to your class Preethi ! Vikram and the other seniors looked at him startled and nobody spoke a word. I looked at him so gratefully, by that time, my tears were rolling down my cheek. Shiva said, don’t cry and ushered us outside. As I was moving out of the class, I heard Shiva shouting at Vikram on the behavior with the new joinees.

I sat in my class, thinking about it. My friends teased me on behalf of Vikram and Shiva. I sighed. But somehow, the naughty character of Vikram attracted me. Most of the days I will look for Vikram in the bus or whenever I cross his classroom and almost all the time I will end up seeing 4 eyes ,yah both Vikram’s and Shiva’s. It’s already a month, I always had the rush to talk to Vikram, but somehow I couldn’t. That evening I was speaking with my mom, and carefully I opened the subject about Vikram and my mom exclaimed yah Gayathri’s son …Hows he doing?

After a chit chat, I took my mom’s phone book and started searching. I found two gayathri! I don’t know which one! I dialed from my landline to one of the Gayathri’s number.A lady picked the phone, I asked tremblingly, is Vikram in home? Astonished! She replied in a stern voice, who are you? I disconnected the phone! My hands were already wet with fear. I sweated. I didn’t know what to do! I didn’t know what I dialed his number! I was terrified to the maximum thinking, what will happen, if he finds out? Will he embarrass me or what ? what? I got a severe headache! Again I dint sleep properly that night!

The next day, I didn’t dare to look at him in the bus as well in the college. In the Lunch break, Vikram came to my class, with another guy. He called me out. I started to tremble from my feet, my three friends joined me. I went near him. He introduced the new guys Madhav , to me. I said Hi weakly. Then casually he asked…so Preethi “Did you call my home yesterday”. God!! I stood still, suddenly I couldn’t hear anything. I felt that the world stopped rotating. I wondered how on the world he found that! Priya gave me a shake. I came back to reality. I took a deep breath and with a cold face and tears in my eyes, I replied back, how dare you ask me this? What do you think of me? Do you think I am a girl going after guys? I never expected you to be this cheap!

Vikram stood stunned without knowing what to do??

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Yelling at Vikram, I rushed to the nearest wash room. I really couldn’t understand how I acted so well. But fear and guilty feeling gripped me so badly. When I came out my four friends convinced me and scolded Vikram so badly. I couldn’t bear those words, but somehow I told them to stop speaking on that topic and headed back to my class. In the evening Interval, in the pantry, Vikram came straight to me, and calmly said a simple Sorry. I didn’t reply back. He broke the silence and told me, my mom told that a girl called me, I don’t know why, but I got an instinct that it was you. But never meant to hurt you. I am sincerely sorry. He moved saying this. I stood staring at him dumbfounded. My friends gave a glare at me.

Next afternoon, whole of our classes were divided in to two batches. Except for Anu, I, Priya and Thivya were in the same batch. We all went inside the lab, but the second year CSE students have occupied already. I saw Vikram and Shiva sitting in the left corner. They departed from the lab, I turned to the opposite direction, so that I don’t have to face them. Our lecturer directed us to occupy any seats; I pulled Priya and took the same seat where Vikram and Shiva were seated. Our lecturer started with simple exercises on VB, and when I opened the system, it had many documents saved with Shiva’s name. Then I realized in a hurry I took Shiva’s seat. I cannot tell this to Priya, because I was maintaining a decent image with my friends. Any way now and then I interrupted Priya and peeped in to Vikrams programs and documents. Priya started to notice that I am taking lots of interest on Vikram. I created so many documents and I created my profile with my likes and don’t likes and saved with my name. This I did purely for Vikram to take notice.

But unfortunately, I started to get disturbances from Ganesh, my class mate. He made rubbish comments when we passed by. He occupied the same computer, as he is in the other batch. He made lots of stupid documents. This started spreading like a wild fire. One fine day, during the lunch break, Vikram , Madhav ,Shiva and 2 more other guys came to our class. They called Ganesh and his friends outside. They had a discussion for few seconds. Once our seniors moved away, Ganesh came straight to me, he shouted, What Preethi! Threatening me with seniors!!hah!!! As of now I will leave it and I will take my revenge at the right time! The moment he moved away, my face brightened and I couldn’t believe that Vikram has started taking interest in me. My friends started to tease. But I strictly told them, that I don’t like these kinds of comments.

We got a circular, that the fresher’s party is going to happen the coming Friday. The fresher’s party was on the 45th day since our first day. The whole college was on causals, it’s a cool break from our weird uniforms. We had culturals, games, lunch, competitions etc. After lunch, the senior girls called all the fresher girls and gave knitting threads and told us to do rakhi bands. We were confused initially. Then around 4.00 PM, they told us to tie the bands to any guys we want. It was so funny to watch, guys running here and there. We four girls stood watching this and laughing.

I said, I will tie this band to Ganesh! Priya reacted immediately and said, why you don’t tie it for Vikram. A moment, I suffered from electric shock. But I stood, as if I was least bothered and I replied back, Big deal! If he is ready then I can tie. Not a Problem. I literally prayed to God, that Priya shouldn’t take any adverse steps. But without waiting a second, she ran and called Vikram, who was standing at the other side of the corridor, and called me from there. I didn’t know what to do. I felt, I will run away somewhere. But Anu and Thivya started to scream, hey Preethi, come…come… lets have fun. I felt like that I was having stroke. But we moved near them. Vikram looked confused. Madhav and Shiva stared equally confused.

Priya screamed, Vikram anna (Vikram Brother), Preethi wants to tie this rakhi for you. Vikram smiled casually, Oh is it…Good then I have got a beautiful sister…he exclaimed! My world really stopped when he uttered these words. I dint speak anything, I dint even look at him, I took the rakhi and tied it in his right hand. I tied it and my hands trembled so violently. Priya mocked at me, why dear your hands are shaking as if, hadn’t taken food for many days. Vikram alleged back, may be Priya …she wouldn’t have got such a handsome brother like me.

I ran to the washroom. I cried , cried, cried,…That is what I did. I couldn’t believe what had happened. I cursed Priya, I cursed Vikram.I cursed everybody. But in vain. I didn’t speak to anybody in the bus. I was completely out of form. I came to home and slept immediately. My mom woke me in the morning, I excused to take an off to college stating that I was not feeling well. The whole day I was really struggling with emotions. I cried. I couldn’t sleep. The next day, I had no option but to go to college. I boarded the bus and I sat near Priya. I didn’t say a word. Thivya and Priya kept on giggling, but I dint speak a word. After some time Priya slipped a book, with a big white paper on it stating ‘Go to Page 45’. I gave a cold stare. But she pointed her finger to the book. Irritated I opened the page 45. Bewildered, I saw the same Rakhi which I tied to Vikram, covered in pink polythene with a small note in it. “I will never accept you as my sister”.

I….I don’t ….Know….I…what to do….what to react….???!!###&&*&(^%$!!!

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I sat still, without knowing what to do. I squeezed Priya’ s hands and pulled her near me and whispered in her hear ,’who gave this to u’? She gave a loud laugh. I urged her to be quiet and tell the story. We leaned on the bus seat, and Priya with a bright smile on her face narrated.

‘Vikram called me yesterday during the lunch break. Shiva was not there but Madhav was along with him. He enquired me, why you were absent today? Then he gave this book to me and told me not to open this and also he insisted me to give this to you only in the bus, as he wants to see your reaction.’But anyway , we all saw what was inside the book yesterday itself de!!!

Aiyoooooo….I couldn’t control myself. I felt like jumping. But this time I failed to maintain my reaction in the face. I was very sure that Vikram would have realized the relief and happiness in my face. I kept a smiling face, wondering how the college‘s most handsome boy started taking interest in me. All four of us went inside the classroom and got seated in our last desk. Unusually, the window near us was closed completely. The fan above us is a name sake fan, so Anu went near the window to open it. The moment she took the latch out, the guys at the other end screamed. They blasted in some unknown words, and Ganesh shouted, if anybody tries to open that window, their hand will be gone. (The boys wanted to close the window, as it was near the corridor. So they get caught as the Principal or the staffs often peeps through that)

I was sure that Ganesh spoke some very very bad word and got outraged. I walked straight to the window and I pushed Anu aside and I opened the big window wide open. I turned back and leaned myself in the wall and I folded my hands and kept my legs crossed in a very stylish position and gave a glare at the boys. All my friends were stunned and the whole class was clam looking at me. Sensing the stillness of the classroom, suddenly a fear gripped me. But no matter what, I didn’t show that in my face. Ganesh came straight to me. He was so huge and tall, the moment he came near me, I looked so tiny, and I was only till his chest. He gave an ugly smile and told me, it would just take seconds to throw you out. I sighed, and I gave a cruel hatred smile at him and I barked back, I would use those few seconds of time to give a tight slap to you and the rest of the 3 years you have to spend your days , as a coward who got a tight slap from a girl.

The whole class was stunned at my words. But only God knows how violently I was trembling and how badly I was choked with fear. He gave a cold look at me and shouted, so the seniors are backing you lady, that is the reason behind your boldness. I replied back, Shut your mouth. Between, our lecturer Mr. Raj came inside our class. Immediately we all got seated in our seats. My friends were awestruck at my boldness and I was so proud of that.

I was in Cloud Nine ?thinking about Vikram ‘s refusal on Rakhi and Victory over Ganesh and I hardly listened to the class. We didn’t take any notes and all four of us were giggling. Suddenly Mr. Raj came to our last row and we didn’t notice that at all, as we were busy teasing each other. He roared, Preethi, what is happening there, and show me your notes? Oops, the note book that I had on my desk was Civil Note Book. But Raj deals with Engineering Drawing. All four of us stood up with our heads down. Raj gave a look at my notebook and threw it outside. I couldn’t believe what had happened. He told all four of us to stand outside the class room. God, this has never happened in my life. What a shame. We all stood near the door. Ganesh’s friends and most of the girls who likes Ganesh gave a sarcastic smile at us.

The same moment Shiva and Vikram crossed our classroom. OOOh God!!! Why on earth! This happens to me. I urged my friends not to look left and right. Once they crossed us, I slowly turned right to see Vikram.Oops he immediately turned back, and gave a mocking laugh at me. Chaa…… I hate this…. always I get caught!!!!

Again after sometime I turned right to see Vikram……but this time it was Shiva who turned back….It’s worse than the earlier!!!

Now a circular came, it’s nothing but the …Timetable for the Periodical……..Exams………………..

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I hardly studied anything. My mom was pampering me with Tea and snacks to aid me to study well. But all the while, I enjoyed the hot tea and kept dreaming. Whatever the questions, I came across; I just thought I will study it in the bus. The next day, in the bus, we four kept giggling and teasing each other. Often we received cold vibes from other students, who were sincerely reading for the exams. We confirmed out exam halls and I was thrilled, when I heard that we will be sitting with the seniors for the exams. Except for Anu, all three of us were in the same hall. I was sure that, both Vikram and Shiva will be sitting with us, since we fall in the lower part of the alphabets. Keeping fingers crossed, we appeared in the exam hall, leaving our bags outside.

The hall was occupied with 4 columns and 10 rows. The 1st column for 1year, 2nd one for 2nd year and 3rd and 4th year thereon. Who bothered about 3rd and 4th year? I walked so coolly, as if I was a studious girl, thinking only about the exam paper. (But honestly, I was praying sincerely so that Vikram should sit next to me). We walked looking on the numbers written on the desk. I saw my number and the desk next to me was empty. I still had hope. Priya sat behind me and Thivya sat at the dead last seat. I kept turning back and made gestures to Priya and Thivya. The invigilator gave a bang on her table and gave a cold stare at me. Immediately, I sat still without making any motion.

It was exactly 9.58 AM, Shiva and Vikram came in to the class. They walked checking the numbers on the desk and Vikram passed crossing me. My jaw dropped. Oh God!! Why I am so unfortunate and the most ..most…unfortunate thing is Shiva sat parallel to me. Ayooo!! Without showing expressions, I turned to the other end, staring at the wall. Priya kicked my chair and I turned back, she gestured with her eye brows to look at Thivya. To Break my heart more Vikram sat parallel to Thivya and to pierce me more , he was chatting with her with full smile. I turned back and suddenly I felt more jealous on Thivya. The invigilator distributed the question paper and the answer sheet. Now and then my eyes met with Shiva’s and I will give a ugly smile at him without knowing how to react. The next shock is when I saw the question paper. I have never even heard about the terms mentioned in the question paper. I kept staring at the question paper, but Shiva already completed the first page in the answer sheet.

God!!! I wrote my number and I wrote the question. I didn’t know what to write more. I have never been like this during my school times, I felt so ashamed of myself. Since its periodicals, it was 1 hour and 30 minutes examination. Somehow I pushed one hour. I struggled so much and I completed 4 pages. It was just 10 minutes more, suddenly the CSE department HOD came inside our hall. He peeped in to the students papers. He came near Shiva and took his paper in his hands, he gave a glance and appreciated him….Good Going Boy and gave him a pat.

But all of a sudden, he pulled my paper. I was shocked and suddenly most of my body went numb. He gave a look and told me , see lady, you should at least write minimum of 10 lines in a single page. You shouldn’t write 5 lines in a page and waste the paper. As I expected, the whole exam hall roared with laughter and Vikram laughed as if he will fall down from his desk…..

How to avoid Office Relationships

Letter by a Doctor (I don't know whether he is really a doctor, but the content is real & worth-reading and worth to follow...)

Dear All,

"In the wake of two shocking incidents that took place in Bangalore and Hyderabad, couples committing suicide because of extra-marital affairs with their colleagues. I just thought of writing a small article on how to avoid such incidents. This is really a serious matter and if not dealt on at an early stage could lead to such incidents in our personal life too. I have done research on human behavior and psychology and am trying to put-in some text which may (or may not) be helpful to you. Never-the-less I feel it's worth knowing such things and if possible every individual can make a conscious effort to more or less follow the same.

Some people don't take advice but taking good advice may do you no harm.

Those who are not married this is the best article as before starting a new relationship if you are ready for it, will only help you to lead a happy life.

Read on….

We spend 40/45/50/60 hours a week with our colleagues. This is the most we spend with any members of our family. So it's obvious they are an integral part of our life. Good, understood. But an important point to remember is colleagues are colleagues and not friends and if you think they are friends then you are highly mistaken. Imagine working together for 9 hours a day together and then returning home and continuing to talk with your colleague on phone. This is what happened with that Infosys guy who could not stand this behavior of his wife and killed her and committed suicide. Which husband would like his wife talking on phone with her colleague and that too male counterpart? Or which wife will like her husband doing the same? Just keep yourself in that situation and see. Anger will creep in within you.

So whatever gossip or topic you want to discuss with your colleagues do it during office hours and once you are out of office forget about your work and your colleagues unless it's official matter.

Just check this unnecessary talk…

A guy and her colleague walk out of office at 6.30p.m every day. At 7.30 or 8.00 the guy calls that female;

Guy: Hi, how are you? Where have you reached? (Don't you know how she is and where she must be at this time?)

Lady: I am fine. Reached home!

Guy: What are you cooking today?

Lady: So and so

(Now here the lady knows that the guy has called to flirt with her and the call is unnecessary. It's the duty of the female to say something to avoid that guy. If she doesn't at this stage then this call will be going for another 30-45 mins and questions like 'When will you be taking bath? What time you will sleep? What will you bring for me for breakfast for tomorrow will creep in?' and imagine the state of the family members of that lady at this point.

They expect the lady to come and talk with them for sometime but here this lady is enjoying a talk with the guy with whom she has been working since morning.

No wonder such people will have a horrendous married life.

A simple thing to think about is Say you are not married. You go to office and come back say at 6.00 in the evening. You have so much of time left. Can't you read some books and increase your knowledge rather than spending one-two hours on mobile. Girls can start experimenting with new dishes. Main thing to understand is such gossiping on calls becomes on habit and bad habits die-hard. You will be addicted to talking and this can be bad as time goes on. One you start working you have to come out of college life. In college you could enjoy, flirt, and do anything you wanted. But this is real life. Be responsible or else you will be responsible for your terrible life and the life if your husband/wife.

Any person no matter who he/she is would never like his/her wife/husband having such relationship with her/his colleagues.

Last year 90% of divorce happened because of Extra-Marital Affairs, in that 80% because of relationships with colleagues. And we would not like this to happen with us. So start from now.

Guys see to it that you don't put a habit of calling you female-colleagues after office hours or on weekends or holidays, even if they provoke you or give missed calls. Let them spend time with their family members or other friends. You also do the same. Good girls don't give missed calls. And girls who give stay away from them. You can talk as much as you want in office. And if any guy calls a gal then it is not bad to say 'No, Let's talk in office' or 'I am busy, talk with you tomorrow' to that guy. Do it twice and they will automatically stop calling. Guys have this habit of flirting and you allowing them to flirt will only help them do more. Relationships can always be maintained in right manner. Never succumb to emotional pressure like 'You don't want to talk with me or what' or 'You can call him but you can't call me' or 'You talk for so and so time with her but with me only this much'. Some people fall for this because they don't want to lose him/her. Again I say colleague is not a friend. They are just here to work and keep on moving in their life. They go to other company, go for growth and so on. They will not wait for you in the same office to be with you forever. So don't be emotionally attached with your colleagues. They are competitors and always on their toes to show you down in front of seniors and managers. You may not realize now but this is a fact, be ready for it.

Imagine a girl getting married and someone says to her to be husband that guy over there is the one who regularly calls your wife or your wife gives missed calls or calls that guy. Always this thing will remain on the back of his mind. Similarly someone tells the bride that your groom always keeps calling that girl or vice-versa…. Imagine yourself at that place. Situations arise because we allow them to. No one can lead ideal life but we can always make a sincere effort to lead one.

Another note to be taken about: (strictly male to female and female to male contexts)

If your colleague calls you just check out whether if he calls others also and if he doesn't then find out why? No guy will call other girl if he is not interested in that girl. In a group there can be five females but it's not necessary that a guy calls all five. He will only call the one on whom he is interested. Similarly, a girl will not give missed call to everyone. If she gives then she must be really lonely. Stay away from them or you will be caught in their loving talk. Guys normally fall for girls because of their beauty or their talk. So if a guy colleague comes to you and proposes you then it's not his mistake completely, it's more of yours because you were the one who used to give him that space.

Also you become a topic of gossip among your fellow colleagues if they come to know that one of their colleagues is calling you and not calling others. And there is nothing more dangerous than office gossip. It can cost you your job and just remember how easily you got this job.

So please keep your office and its people at office and lead a normal happy life for your good and for the good of your spouse. Send it to your colleagues, friends, relatives, parents and everyone and avoid incidents like the one mentioned at the beginning of this article. If you feel anyone is doing anything mentioned above then just go and tell him/her. You will be helping someone in their life."

'LOKPAL-BILL

Dear All,


Government of India put a condition that 25 CRORES of people support is needed to implement 'LOKPAL-BILL'

For this we just have to GIVE A MISSED call (Free) to the following number from your Mobile -

‘’022 61550789’’ (Authentic number given by none other than Kiran Bedi)

After giving a missed call to this no. You'll receive a thanks msg.

Forward this to as many as possible to make India corruption free!!

Lets do a bit from our side to save our India from these corrupt politicians !!

Lets be a part of this movement to punish those corrupt people...



"The world suffers a lot,

Not because of the violence of bad people,

But because of the silence of good people!"

for more details:
http://www.indiaagainstcorruption.org/

How to start conversation with new people

Whether you are a host or a guest, there are many social situations that will call for interaction, even when you are stumped for some way to get it going. For example, you might want to help a friend’s new “significant other” feel comfortable. Or, you might see a stranger across a crowded room, and realize that this is your only chance to impress Mr. or Ms. Wonderful. Then, you realize that you’re not sure what to say.


Start with a “hello,” and simply tell the new person your name then ask them theirs.

Offer your hand to shake, upon his/her responding to you. (If you go to other countries, greet the person in tune with the particular culture). If you already know the person, skip this step and proceed to step.

Look around. See if there is anything worth pointing out. Sure, talking about the weather is a cliche, but if there’s something unusual about it–bam!–you’ve got a great topic of conversation.

Offer a compliment. Don’t lie and say you love someone’s hair when you think it’s revolting, but if you like his or her shoes, or a handbag, say so. A sincere compliment is a wonderful way to get someone to warm up to you. But be careful not to say something so personal that you scare the person off or make him or her feel uncomfortable. It is best not to compliment a person’s looks or body.

Ask questions! Most people love to talk about themselves — get them going. “What classes are you taking this year?” “Have you seen (Insert-Something-Here)? What did you think of it?” Again, keep the questions light and not invasive. Do not ask too many questions if he or she is not responsive to them.

Jump on any conversation-starters he or she might offer; take something he or she has said and run with it. Agree, disagree, ask a question about it, or offer an opinion, just don’t let it go by without notice.

Look your newfound friend in the eye, it engenders trust (but don’t stare). Also, use the person’s name a time or two during the conversation; it will help you remember the name, and will draw the person’s attention to what you are talking about.

Don’t forget to smile and have fun with your conversation!

Tips

Just relax. Chances are that whatever small-talk you’re making isn’t going to stick out in anyone’s mind a few months from now. Just say whatever comes into your head, so long as it’s not offensive or really weird. (Unless, of course, the person you’re attempting to converse with is into weird stuff.)

Remember, if you think of something in your head while you’re talking, it’s probably related.

It will help if you watch some TV, listen to radio shows, and/or read a lot — newspapers, magazines, and/or books. You need to have some idea of what is going on in the world. Also remember and plan to share anything you like, think is funny, or find intriguing. This is building up your own library of things that might be helpful to another person during a conversation someday. It will be amazing how you thread these interesting things when you least expect it, and make conversation an adventure instead of a dreadful task. If you take it to the next step and say things that you want the person to think of as adding value, and keep to yourself things that the person might not, you are actually honing your own personality to be appealing to the other person, and what is a greater act of kindness than that.

If you are shy, it will be helpful to have thought about a topic or two that you could talk about.

Follow the lead that your listener is expressing. If he or she appears interested, then continue. If he or she is looking at a clock or watch, or worse, looking for an escape strategy, then you have been going on for too long.

Interesting and funny quotes or facts can lighten things up, and make way for things to talk about. You could also use a set of conversation starter question cards for inspiration.

If talking over the phone, keep the person involved in the conversation at all costs. If you can’t come up with a good topic, try the “questions” game. Just keep asking them questions; random questions work just fine as long as they are appropriate. This technique can save a phone conversation. The questions should be open ended questions that do not require a yes or no answer. For example “How do you know the hosts?” This way you can ask questions about what they just said or follow up with how you know the hosts (for example) instead of acting as if the conversation is an interrogation.

Half of an effective conversation is the way you non-verbally communicate, and not necessarily what you say. Practice better non-verbal skills that are friendly and confident.

Read newspapers and magazines to increase your knowledge so you can have more interesting things to talk about.

True Love

My husband is an Engineer by profession, I love him for his steady nature, and I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders.


Three years of courtship and now, two years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons of me loving him before has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness. I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings, I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband, is my complete opposite, his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about love. One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.

Why he asked, shocked. I am tired, there are no reasons for everything in the world! I answered. He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep thought with a lighted cigarette at all times. My feeling of disappointment only increased, here was a man who can't even express his predicament, what else can I hope from him And finally he asked me What can I do to change your mind Somebody said it right, it's hard to change a person's personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.

Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered Here is the question, if you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind, Let's say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death, will you do it for me?

He said I will give you your answer tomorrow... My hopes just sank by listening to his response.

I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes....

My dear, I would not pick that flower for you, but please allow me to explain the reasons further.. This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading..

1. When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs, and you cry in front of the screen, I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.

2. You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you.

3. You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city, I have to save my eyes to show you the way.

4. You always have the cramps whenever your good friend approaches every month, I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your Tummy.

5. You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.

6. You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails, and help to remove those annoying white hairs.

7. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand... and tell you the color of flowers, just like the color of the glow on your young face...

Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do... I could not pick that flower yet, and die..

My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting... and as I continue on reading... Now, that you have finished reading my answer, if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk... I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread.... Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone... That's life, and love.

When one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fades away, and one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace and dullness.

Love shows up in all forms, even very small and cheeky forms, it has never been a model, it could be the most dull and boring form.. . flowers, and romantic moments are only used and appear on the surface of the relationship.

Under all this, the pillar of true love stands... and that's our life... Love, not words win arguments..!

Support for Anna Hazare

Dear All,


Please do forward it to everyone for making our country a better place to live for us and our next generations. In support to Hunger strike launched by Anna Hazare (Veteran soldier of India and Social Activist) we are planning to keep this momentum going on and pressurize the Govt to make amendments to the Lokpal bill taking Jan Lokpal bill into consideration.

We request all the interested people to come and participate in the relay hunger strike at 9AM INDIRA PARK,Hyderabad on 8th April 2011.



1. Who is Anna Hazare?


An ex-army man. Fought 1965 Indo-Pak War



2. What's so special about him?

He built a village Ralegaon Siddhi in Ahamad Nagar district, Maharashtra



3. So what?

This village is a self-sustained model village. Energy is produced in the village itself from solar power, biofuel and wind mills.

In 1975, it used to be a poverty clad village. Now it is one of the richest village in India. It has become a model for self-sustained, eco-friendly & harmonic village.



4. Ok,...?

This guy, Anna Hazare was awarded Padma Bhushan and is a known figure for his social activities.



5. Really, what is he fighting for?

He is supporting a cause, the amendment of a law to curb corruption in India.



6. How that can be possible?

He is advocating for a Bil, The Lok Pal Bill (The Citizen Ombudsman Bill), that will form an autonomous authority who will make politicians (ministers), beurocrats (IAS/IPS) accountable for their deeds.



7. It's an entirely new thing right..?

In 1972, the bill was proposed by then Law minister Mr. Shanti Bhushan. Since then it has been neglected by the politicians and some are trying to change the bill to suit thier theft (corruption).



8. Oh.. He is going on a hunger strike for that whole thing of passing a Bill ! How can that be possible in such a short span of time?

The first thing he is asking for is: the government should come forward and announce that the bill is going to be passed.

Next, they make a joint committee to DRAFT the LOK PAL BILL. 50% goverment participation and 50% public participation. Because you cant trust the government entirely for making such a bill which does not suit them.



9. Fine, What will happen when this bill is passed?

A LokPal will be appointed at the centre. He will have an autonomous charge, say like the Election Commission of India. In each and every state, Lokayukta will be appointed. The job is to bring all alleged party to trial in case of corruptions within 1 year. Within 2 years, the guilty will be punished. Not like, Bofors scam or Bhopal Gas Tragedy case, that has been going for last 25 years without any result.



10. Is he alone? Whoelse is there in the fight with Anna Hazare?

Baba Ramdev, Ex. IPS Kiran Bedi, Social Activist Swami Agnivesh, RTI activist Arvind Kejriwal and many more.

Prominent personalities like Aamir Khan is supporting his cause.



11. Ok, got it. What can I do?

At least we can spread the message. How?

Putting status message, links, video, changing profile pics.

At least we can support Anna Hazare and the cause for uprooting corruption from India.

At least we can hope that his Hunger Strike does not go in vain.

At least we can pray for his good health.


This event will be a huge success and we can bring change in our govt policies if 1 can join us out of every 10 who came out when India won the WC2011.




This is a huge movement which is happening after a very long time.. Please realize the importance of this .. if the change happens it will happen now otherwise never...



A 73 year Indian soldier is fighting for YOU. What are you waiting for??

Nice Story

Anxious about the future?


Once two villagers were sitting under a tree and watching the sunset. They were very close friends. After sitting quietly for some time, one asked the other, "What are you thinking?"

"I am planning to buy five acres of land, a garden." The other friend immediately said, "Don't buy the garden!"

The first one was surprised. He asked "why"? The second one replied, "I am planning to buy a buffalo. Then, my buffalo will enter your garden and we will fight, have misunderstandings and lose our friendship. I do not want to lose our friendship."

The first one said, "Then, you cancel your plan of buying a buffalo. I am going to buy my garden." The second one said, "No, no, no. I have already decided to buy a buffalo." The first one said, "How will your buffalo enter my garden? I will fence it thoroughly."

The second one said, "No, you see it can just enter; a buffalo is a buffalo. Who can stop it? It can do anything."

They started fighting. The fight went to such an extent that they broke their limbs! Neither has bought buffalo nor any land.

Nothing has happened. Just the mind’s race and both of them broke their limbs over it!

Our fears are also like that. The future has not yet come. But you just sit there and think, "Oh! What will happen? This will happen. That will happen."

Many times our minds are filled with anxiety about the future! In this run, the mind gets into such a mess.

Don’t be over anxious about the future. 